Throughout the course of humanity, there have been subgroups that have annoyed the rest of society. Jesus had the Pharisees, Nixon had the hippies, and Boston College has the bros.
You may be wondering, what exactly is a bro? A bro can be defined as a person (most often male, though not exclusively) who frequently sports preppy pastel clothing, backwards fitted hats, and lacrosse (lax) pinnies. A bro who actually plays the sport of lacrosse can also be further classified as a “lax bro.” Bros typically have a biological affinity for Natural (Natty) Light as well as dipping tobacco.
Language is also a key element of the bro. Phrases such as “did you hear about me last night” and “yo let’s crush these natty lights mad quick man” are common things that bros like to say to each other. When two bros cross paths it is common etiquette for the two to either exchange in a “bro hug” if the two are members of the same coven, or simply an arched high five if the bros are unfamiliar with each other’s scent.
Television provides necessary bonding time for bros. Bros often gather together on Sunday nights to watch Entourage and Eastbound & Down, which provides them with new quotes to help them “spit game” until the next episode airs. Bros also bond over video games such as Madden and NHL.
So why is it then that bros have attracted such negative attention? Many Boston College students who are not believers in the bro culture are afraid that the bros are too predominant on campus, leading others to label BC as a “bro college.” There is in fact a website titled broston-college.com, the ultimate resource for a bro at BC.
The other concern is the large packs that bros travel in. Much like the sand people from Star Wars, bros often travel in single file to hide their numbers when entering a party. A simple get together can instantly turn into a bro fest if adequate measures are not taken to fortify your defense. Other less important criticisms revolve around the alleged rude behavior displayed toward women and the occasional assumption that some bros appear to be more intoxicated than they actually are.
One can easily identify a bro coven by the ratio of backwards hats to potential bros. If the number of people wearing backwards hats to people not wearing hats is greater than two to one, you are likely in the presence of bros.
Not all of the views on bros are negative though. The bros’ social behavior has given them a more positive light by some when compared to other social subgroups. Would a group of emos ever hoist you up for a keg stand? Would hipsters ever step foot in a house occupied by people who play Dave Matthews Band at a party? I don’t think so. Bros’ behavior may get on your nerves, but they are, generally speaking, nice and entertaining people.
Are bros really giving BC a bad name? Are we even really qualified to judge? A bro would respond to that question with a simple “don’t taze me bro”. Maybe he isn’t so wrong. After all, bros really haven’t done anything to harm the rest of the non bro society. Students may not want to become followers of “broism” but they should at least be aware that there is more to the backwards-fitted hat than meets the eye.