Moan to Malone

by • March 21, 2011 • Society & PeopleComments (0)556

Dr. Malone,

I have a problem. There’s this girl in my Intro to Feminism class who keeps texting me on weekends. If I do not respond, she just texts again and again as if I’ve answered her question. She texts me every day even though I’ve been ignoring her for a week. She wants to know what I’m doing on weekends and asks if she can sleep in my bed. Why can’t she take a hint? How do I get rid of her? I believe she’s overstayed her welcome.

Sincerely,

Prince Ababwa

Prince Ababwa,

I agree with you that this girl has likely overstayed her welcome, though from the way you put it she never came over in the first place. This girl looks like she’s got a few screws loose. Maybe she is one of those flower children who organized Meatless Monday. Hippies don’t really have boundaries. In that case, you might want to pelt her with soap to scare her away. That might be a little extreme though.

On a more serious note, there are a few ways of getting rid of her. You misdiagnosed neglect as a solution to your problem. The Doctor suggests an alternative prescription for your problem.

You need to talk to this girl. Assuming her dad didn’t pay off admissions to get her in, she must have some degree of intelligence. She might not be able to take a hint, but if you say, “I’m sorry, I’m just not looking to pursue a relationship with you,” maybe she’ll go away. Or you could buy her a copy of the movie He’s Just Not That Into You, but I wouldn’t recommend that. It’s not a very good movie and will likely just make her sad(der).

This girl clearly has self esteem issues. Nobody in his or her right mind would continuously attempt communication with someone as disinterested as you appear to be. It might be a good idea to let her down softly. Or you could find a jerry to set her up with. Perhaps he might not feel that she has overstayed her welcome.

Dr. Malone,

I have a problem with my boyfriend. He’s great with just about everything, but there’s just one glaring issue that I can’t get over. He won’t watch chick flicks with me. He forces me to watch Arnold Schwarzenegger marathons on AMC with him, but when it comes to Love Actually he suddenly needs to go to the Plex. What do I do? Do I dump him? I can’t watch Eraser again; it’s not very good.

Sincerely,

Get my boyfriend to the chopper.

Chopper,

I’ll let you in on a little secret. Boys do not like chick flicks. It’s been that way for years and that’s not likely to change. Love Actually is a Christmas movie so I can’t exactly blame him for not wanting to watch that in the middle of March. I’m sure this problem goes beyond Hugh Grant movies though. Also, let me say congratulations for watching Eraser. It isn’t one of Arnie’s best.

You and your boyfriend need to establish some middle ground on this issue. Try and find some movies that both of you can enjoy. You have only mentioned movies that exist on opposite ends of the spectrum of appeal here.

If your boyfriend only likes action movies featuring jacked foreigners with terrible catch phrases, you might have an issue. This means he isn’t likely to cave on future issues, and that’s not good for either one of you.

Let’s look at some movies that both of you may be able to enjoy. Have you seen Black Swan? It will likely satisfy your need for a chick flick and will also give your boyfriend enough suspense to stay awake. That unfortunately is the end of the line for the ballet-thriller genre, but you can use the common ground found here to build on future excursions to the movies.

The King’s Speech is another one to check out. It did after all just win the Academy Award for Best Picture, (did you know The Observer was the only newspaper on campus to get that one right?). If you’re boyfriend refuses to watch that one, you might need to question whether or not he’s a good fit for you. The Doctor does not prescribe boys without culture to girls. It’s simply unethical.

This problem is rather mild. You should see one of the other questions I found in my mailbox. Somebody wanted help because they wanted to eat their girlfriend. But that’s too much to handle. Just make sure that you’re boyfriend doesn’t make you watch any more Schwarzenegger movies. It looks like you’ve already watched the good ones.

Dr. Malone can be reached at ian@thebcobserver.com.

Pin It

Related Posts

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *