Everyone knows that New England winters are notorious for being possibly the worst things ever. As I’m sitting in the Chocolate Bar frantically sending telepathic messages to the professor of my 1 PM class in desperate hopes that he’ll cancel, I can’t help but look out the window and wonder how anybody can function properly in this weather without questioning why they didn’t go to an online college. When I woke up this morning, there was nothing I wanted more than to throw on a pair of old sweatpants, put my hair up in a messy bun, and head to class, but then I remembered that this is Boston College and I have to look my absolute best at all times (you never know who you’ll run into during a blizzard, am I right?); on that note, I’ve decided to compile my version of a fashion guide for the typical BC student. I totally have the qualifications to be doing this.
Let’s start from the bottom. If you don’t have a pair of Bean Boots, do you really even go to BC? Boston College has a very weird obsession with uncomfortable shoes. I have never had a pair of shoes here that weren’t absolute torture to break in, which really makes no sense because walking up the million dollar stairs at 8:45 AM is already basically the equivalent of climbing Mount Everest. Make sure to get these boots in a size smaller than your actual shoe size or plan to always be wearing hiking socks because apparently that’s a thing (even though L.L. Bean could just as easily make the shoes smaller so they were true to size). I thought these shoes would have really good traction since they’re advertised as being suitable for all sorts of outdoor adventures, but I immediately reneged that assumption when I wiped out on the stairs by Conte Forum. On a side note, Timberlands are also acceptable as long as you’re from either Long Island or New Jersey and listen to Drake on a regular basis.
Grey Goose (wait..Canada Goose) Jacket:
These jackets are essential if you want people to know just how much money you are willing to put into staying warm during your 15 minute walk from Lower to Stokes every day. You would think that these are just typical black, knee length jackets with furry accented hoods, but you would be wrong. These jackets also have a super cool label on the arm that you can shove in all of your friend’s faces while telling them that your dad is a lawyer and your mom is a doctor and that you “probably don’t even really need to go to college, to be honest.” Canada Goose jackets are not only great for going to class in, but are also great for leaving in a random mod on a Friday night because you know your parents will probably just buy you a new one anyway.
This outfit staple only really applies to girls, but if you’re a guy who really wants to take a fashion risk, who am I to discriminate? Wearing Lulu leggings gives everyone the impression that you’ve just come from the gym when in reality the closest you’ve probably gotten to that is dangling precariously off the side of your bed while reaching for the bag of chips you dropped on the floor. Not only are these leggings definitely more comfortable than the ones from Target, but also go with the whole “I’m trying REALLY hard to look like I’m not trying at all” vibe. Similar to the Canada Goose idea, there’s a tiny white label on the side of all these leggings that lets people know that you paid a ton of money for a really generic clothing item.
The final item that I’d like to mention is more of an accessory, but it’s just as important to the Boston College winter appearance as all of the above items. I’m talking about an iced coffee. I don’t care if it’s -20 outside and you forgot your gloves. Carrying an iced coffee in the winter is a great way to assert dominance and flaunt the fact that you aren’t affected by temperature and won’t let a little wind chill stop you from drinking your vanilla soy latte with an extra shot.
Well, there you have it. That’s about all I’ve got for how to stay warm while being cool at Boston College this winter season. Pair any of these fashion items with a “work hard, play hard” mentality and a huge inferiority complex and you’ll be good to go for this semester at BC. Stay tuned for my spring fashion guide, which will probably include some more leggings and iced coffee.